Druglord The Game is strictly intended for adult, responsible players.

I am 100 percent in favor of the intelligent use of drugs, and 1,000 percent against the thoughtless use of them, whether caffeine or LSD.

Timothy Leary

– Our hidden agenda

Druglord seeks to point out, through its cards and its very mechanic, that prohibitionism is the primary reason why drug cartels exist.

The secondary being the imperialistic will to exploit poor countries, funding guerrillas in order to achieve geopolitical supremacy and shatter popular uprisings.

In the end, we firmly believe that it all comes down to the primary governmental agenda: Control on your lives and what you do with your own body.

We believe that prohibitionism destroys people and freedom, while actually encouraging drug abuse and the reasons behind it: sad lives, wage slavery, lack of self-expression.

Think free.

– Gambling

Druglord takes into account wits and luck in an approximate proportion of 75/25. Kudopath games hence strongly advises against betting houses or valuables in a Druglord game.

If you decide to bet any psychoactive substance, we advise to never bet bigger quantities than what can be physically positioned on the board.

We also strongly advise against betting anything at all while playing against ethnic groups notoriously favored by leprechauns and/or vengeful deities.

We absolutely advise against betting your immortal soul playing against entities with a cloven hoof or linked to Goldman-Sachs.

If you already don’t have a soul, you could have an unduly advantage at this game.

Playing Druglord against Death to delay your demise is useless: she always wins.

– Unhealthy Lifestyles

The use of Druglord The Game while under the influence of alcohol or narcotics while driving cars, heavy machinery, hover crafts or cruise ships almost inevitably leads to disaster for you and others.

The use of Druglord during sex is not recommended without protections approved by the General Surgeon, even if practiced by professionals (male or females) under the table.

Playing Druglord while handcuffed constitutes an unduly advantage for your opponents: avoid it unless all the players are handcuffed.

Playing with people linked to terrorist groups could constitute an offense of treason in the United States according to Patriot Act: don’t complain if you undergo extradition in countries where electrodes can be attached to your genitals.

Having played Druglord cannot in any way be considered as tantamount to regular secret service training.

Any suspicious behavior noticed in players during Druglord practice is to be considered normal and not necessarily a sign of secret activity as a police informant.

Playing against officers on duty is not advised against if you remain silent.

Playing against armed individuals is possible if you keep a standard grenade as a deterrent.

In any case, winning at Druglord against mafia bosses, mujaheddin chiefs, and warlords in isolated places like villas in Colombia, caves or tents in remote locations is highly advised against.

Playing Druglord in prisons or psychiatric wards does not help reintegration or rehab but can create interesting business occasions.

Playing against journalists high on DMT can provoke homicidal impulses: bring your lawyer. Playing under the influence of alcohol and/or cocaine can provoke omnipotence delusions: bring a bulletproof vest.

Playing under the influence of Viagra or Cialis could provoke heart attacks and, in case you win, the need to re-paint your walls (ew).

Playing under the influence of opioid can cause somnolence and lower attention, something that your opponents could exploit: Kudopath Games advises against trying to counter-effect this by inhaling cocaine and/or by keeping opponents at gunpoint.

The use of Druglord under the influence of MDMA, hallucinogenic mushrooms or LSD can make your opponents look like ruthless KGB agents, disguised reptilians or bosomy burlesque ballerinas: keep your cool, you are probably exaggerating. The use of ketamine is absolutely advised against: the really good one disappeared in 2014 when the chemical precursors were heavily regulated. That train’s passed, get over it.

– Existential Threats

Kudopath Games does not take responsibility for physical and psychological damages caused by rectal, intravenous, intramuscular, oral assumption of the plastic parts raw or cooked.

This game is not intended for those carrying old-fashioned conservative beliefs: if some player tries to transmit those beliefs to you, defend yourself with therapeutic cannabis and the magic formula “yeah, man, whatever”. If you notice around any clergy, hide your Druglord copy and touch discretely but firmly your private parts.

Cats, dogs, and partners could be offended if you pass more than half day playing Druglord: don’t forget to feed them regularly and pet them from time to time.

Snacks are good, in moderation. This, unless you’re playing against pervert pushers; if so, never accept food or beverages: you could be drugged, abused and sold on an internet auction. It happens more often than you’d think.

This game can cause stress. Stress can cause death. Ergo this game can cause death. If you die because or during this game, ask your heirs to be buried with it, so they’ll have to buy it again.

On the other hand, this game can cause really good laughter. Laughter prolongs life. So in average, this game should not influence your life expectancy.

Yet, Druglord increases general awareness, and that improves your quality of life: support Druglord for more awareness.

Playing Druglord during Christmas, Thanksgiving, Passover or Eid Al-Fitr dinners will definitely eliminate the issue of these boring family reunions, especially if you use the box to beat some wisdom into your boring relatives.

No, seriously. Druglord and all its parts are never to be used as blunt or throwing weapons against any pain-in-the-ass people, particularly the small parts that could cause serious damage to the eardrum and eyes, and the glass board. It’s cool, I know, but must be handled with care.

Any controversy about the rules should be solved by arguing with strangers on the internet at a safe distance, or with your bare hands.

Any weapon can be used only in conformity with the law of the land, and always in strict observance of the traditions of the bygone times: a regular duel, at dawn, behind the Carmelite convent.

– Trigger warning

This game can be addictive and habit forming.

Druglord The Game can also worsen the clinical situation of people who’s already addicted to substances illegal or not. If during the game you happen to see a friend suffering from withdrawal symptoms, do not take them to rob a pharmacy, and most certainly don’t do it before lecturing them about the evils of drugs.

Druglord the Game, while mainly appealing to any kind of psychopaths, addicts, maladjusted, puppeteers, street graduates, and in general to people of scarce morality, does not intend to push anybody into unhealthy life choices.

There’s television for that, folks.